Sunday, March 8, 2015

I Needed to Read This, Perhaps You Do Too

Often All the damn time I find myself searching running websites, looking up running funnies and motivational running memes on Pinterest, shopping for compression socks, novelty socks, knee highs, ankle socks, socks to run in. Socks. I look at running jewelry, running plaques, other people's running pictures. I get psyched up and decide to become a morning runner which, in the morning, turns into the decision to become an evening running instead. Which then turns into me being tired, too lazy, and/or too depressed and feeling like a failure to go run in the evening, so I decide to do it in the morning again. Cycle spins, ad nauseum. I have my race bibs on my curtain and my medals hanging beside my bed. I lay here at night and look at them and get excited about getting more. I talk about running until people's eyes glaze over. I try to con my coworkers into running. I get jealous when I see people out running. I analyze perfect running weather conditions for days weeks ahead so I can plan my running habit. I make playlists and arrange them on my iPod by "minutes to run" and race distances. My house is covered in running paraphernalia like wine glasses, racing Ts and technicals, running ribbons, a "running" piggy bank, draw bags from races, and even a pink tambourine from the Komen Race. I search for training plans. I search for training plans I want to do. I search for training plans I think I can follow. I make my own training plans and put them on paper. I have two pairs of Brooks Ravenna 5s, a pair of Asics, a pair of Brooks Pure Grit trail shoes, and even a pair of New Balance racing flats. Not counting my retired pair of Ravenna 3s. I have race bling on my shoes, and just got three Race Kreds in the mail that I haven't put on my laces yet, but am quite pleased with. I'm an ambassador for Sweat Pink, Road ID, Girls Run Fast, Gone for a Run, Girls Gone Sporty, and Espirit De She and love them all. I see mile markers and hills during travel and think, "yeah, I could run that". I run races and the entire while I think, "next time it'll be easier!" I run races and swear I'll never put my body through this shit without training again. I run races and I swear I'm never running again. I sign up for more races. I think of running and I dream of running. I want to run. I feel so much better when I run. I may be nicer when I run. I love running. My life revolves around running.

But I don't do, is run.

More frequently I'm sitting on my bed eating ice cream and watching Netflix while my ass is getting bigger and my self confidence is getting smaller.

Today, I needed to read THIS. And it prompted me to write this post.

Perhaps you need to read it today, too.

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